Time for the Zoo!

We decided to make this trip fun before getting Avery's treatments the next day (Sept. 30th). She has been struggling with going and of course I don't blame her. Although I try to tell her all the fun things she can do while we are there: crafts, read books, watch movies, play games. Now doesn't that sound like fun? When I told her about the zoo she said I know what you're doing-you're just telling me were going to the zoo so I'll go to Salt Lake. Sad she didn't believe me, but the light in her eyes when we walked through those zoo gates was priceless. I love seeing her being a kid, enjoying her childhood and not having to worry! It was the first time, we took all 3 children and Kelsi was so glad to be with us. She probably thinks this is the kind of fun we have every time we leave and say we're taking Avery to the hospital. It was a good break from thinking about everything cancer. It consumes my every thoughts. Remembering all her meds, planning weekly trips, watching her in pain, thinking about what could happen in the future (late side effects) blah blah. So nice to focus on some fun and forget our worries for a bit! Treatment today, went fairly smooth. ANC is 1100, dropped from 6100, but I felt good about it. When on steroids their ANC gives a false high reading. We were off for 7 days, today back on the "roids" for 7 more days. Today was the same chemo as the last two weeks. It makes me sad that she worries and gets so scared to go to the hospital lately. This month she has started throwing up even before she gets her chemo. They gave us a pill to try for next time to help with nausea and to relax her a little. I tell her not to worry that's her parents job and not to be scared where by her side the whole way. But only I can imagine at 5 years old how hard it must be for her at times. After the last drip of toxins entered her body we jetted out of there. She was wiped out and instantly fell asleep. On the way home she woke up hungry & happy! Today while sitting in the infusion area I looked over and their was a 8 months old getting Chemo. I got tears in my eyes has it's hard to understand why these little ones have to go through this. I felt for this mother today & pray things go well for them. As we left the hospital I talked to a mom from Cedar who's child has relapsed from ALL, a cancer mom's worst nightmare come true. Again, I pray for these other families going through so much. At times I know it's hard for Avery to understand that this medicine that makes her feel so miserable at times will save her lives. She understands so much of whats going on. Avery you are so strong, brave and courageous to be going through so much and at such a young age! For me, the third child has been challenging. I feel like I run around all day and never get as much done as I'd like. The baby wakes every few hours and one of the side effects of steroids is difficulty sleeping so Avery struggles sleeping in the night so there's not a lot of sleeping in this household. So many times all three are crying for me, all for different reasons, but I am so grateful for them and know we can do this! So grateful that my sister has been willing to watch my kids while we go to the hospital. I love me 1 pepper & 2 salts:)